Sunday, October 4, 2009

The cry of a little Catholic girl

As a child I was raised Catholic. I remember at a time when I was about in the third grade that I had such a desire to be closer to God. I was not sure how to because we were always told we didn't need to read the bible because it would confuse us. I remember as a young girl of 8 or 9 as being enthralled by the life of Mother Teresa. Though I didn't understand all that her life represented, I knew I wanted that closeness to God that she had. Many times as a young girl, tears would stream down my face, and I would not know why I was crying. I think God was preparing me for something in my future that I might not even know about now at this time. I remember praying and asking God to show me how I could find a way to get close to him. Today the sermon was about "angelic visitations". I remember every time I would go to the library I would get books at my reading level and read up on her. I asked God to put someone in my path that I could help and it would be a gift to Him. When I went to school, private schools had no bus transportation to and from school, so I would walk a mile to school, home for lunch and back again, then back home at the end of the day. I remember this one day I saw an old lady walking down the street, (well, old to a little 8 yr olds eyes). She was waiting to cross the road, and I remember going up to her and asking if I could help her across. She probably wasn't as old as I remember in my mind. I took her hand and helped her across the road, which in reality, she probably thought she was helping me. After we crossed the road, I remember feeling such an inner peace, and I was so thankful that I was able to do something for God that the song "Jesus loves me" started to burst in my heart. I turned around to go into the school and I looked around just seconds after we got across, and the woman was gone. Through the years I have thought of that situation many times, and often wonderend if she was an angel of the Lord, there to entice the heart of a little girl to go on with God. I guess I will never know, but the sermon today made me dwell on this thought all day. As they say on "angels in the outfield" "IT COULD HAPPEN"

Thursday, October 1, 2009

a teacup and a prayer

TUESDAY, JULY 14, 2009

A new excitement.... "A teacup and a prayer"
God is doing something inside me. The bible says be still and know that I am God. I have been still and waited for a long time now. God is telling me it is time to do something, that I have been still long enough. I was beginning to think that all God wanted me to do was be a mom, which is a blessing, but I want more. To be more for God will make me be more for my children. I have a new excitement in me that has not been there for a very long time. An excitement in knowing that God is preparing me for something special, something different. An excitement in knowing that He hears me when I call out to Him. Sometimes I feel that God is a respecter of persons, but I know that He hears us when we ask. My heart has always been in hospitality. We recently started to host a life group at our home, and it gave me a zeal that I have been praying for. I was satisfied with just that, but God wasn't. Since I came back from depression a while back, I still have not gotten in touch with old friends. I shy away from anyone who knew me. Recently I have been feeling the need to rekindle my friendships with old girlfriends. God has been nudging me to start a bible study in our home in the area of friends. Friendships are very important because they provide a way for us to be accountable to one another, and also to learn from one another from our trials and blessings. They provide a way for the older friends to teach the younger ones about life, to be an example, and to share wisdom from things that we ourselves have already been through.The bible study will meet once a month and will be called..."A teacup and a prayer". I don't exactly know what all He is preparing me for, but I do know that I am ready, willing, and by the grace of God, I have been through a battle in the past years that has made me stronger, that has made my faith soar, and has made me persevere. I am confident that whatever valley He has me go through, his grace, and steadfast love will get me back up on that mountain. Father, may I always have a teachable spirit, and may I always take time to be still, and hear your voice. I love you
POSTED BY HEARTLINK AT 9:11 PM

teach me lord, your way

Father help me to love in a "gentle" way
I'm gonna live the way You want me to live
I'm gonna give until there's just no more to give
I'm gonna love till there there's just no more to love
I can never out love you Lord.
Lord do a work on me right now
Perform surgery on my heart.....
I wanna be like You
All the pleasures I used to love
Are fading with time
Help me leave it all at Calvary
Help me with Megan I seem to lose it with her so often
Heal her of her diabetes and heal her heart.
Sometimes I think she feels no reason for living
Create a new heart in me
Mend broken dreams Lord .... I have walked through valleys as all of us have
but I've come to far to look back ... I'm looking forward to the day I see you
break forth through the clouds... thank you father for having hearing ears....


Songs that I love below.....

I'm so glad I'm a part of the family of God
I've been washed in the fountain
Cleansed by His blood
Joint heirs with Jesus
As we travel this sod
For I'm born in the family
The family of God


The king is coming the king is coming
I just heard the trumpet sounding
And now His face I see
Praise God..... He's coming for me!!!!!!

revival in our land

In 1904 there was a revival in Wales that completely transformed lives. It effected lives so much that they closed down bars in that town. All this happened when young people began to experience the reality of God’s divine power, and teams of young people, such as the one led by the most noted of the revivalist, EVAN ROBERTS and his revival party, travelled the country revolutionising the churches.
Could it happen again? Are we willing to set aside our own desires to MAKE it happen? During this time, homes and familes were healed.Meetings like it were taking place across Wales night after night, with fervent prayer and passionate singing - and similar disregard for the clock. They both excited and appalled, left many puzzled and some frightened, but it was reckoned that in less than a year, over a hundred and fifty thousand people had made a new commitment to Jesus Christ.
During the spring of 1904 a young Welshman named Evan Roberts was repeatedly awakened at 1:00 a.m. He met with God in prayer until 5:00 a.m.

Evan Roberts was born in 1878, in Loughor near Swansea, and left school at 11 to go and work down in the coalmine with his father until his early 20's, when he became a blacksmith's apprentice with his uncle in nearby Pontarddulais.



Evan had a thirst for spiritual things from an early age. The story is often told of how he would take his Bible down the mine to read it during rest periods. One day there was an explosion that took the lives of five of his fellow workers. He narrowly escaped death, but the flames scorched the pages of the Bible he was reading. Later, when the revival came, pictures of Evan Roberts' scorched Bible were sent around the world - epitomizing the fire that had fallen on Wales.



For years, Evan had been a faithful member of Moriah Calvinistic Methodist Chapel at Loughor. Having been converted as a young teenager, he was a Sunday School Superintendent, a conscientious reader of the main theological works of his day, and more than that, he had been praying for revival for over 11 years, and he continued

to pray regularly that God would again visit Wales, in Revival Power. Determined to do his part, he felt compelled to go into the Calvinistic Methodist Ministry, and on September 13th 1904, he became a pupil of the Newcastle Emlyn Grammar School to prepare for Trefecca Theological College.

It was only two and a half weeks after arriving that he found himself at Blaenanerch - and at a crossroads in his spiritual experience. He received a mighty Baptism of the Holy Spirit, which would lead him back to the young people of his own church Moriah, Loughor. On his return to Loughor, he went to the prayer meeting, and asked those who were seeking for a deeper spiritual life to stay behind. He shared with those who stayed what God was doing in New Quay, and what had happened to him. Prophesying that Revival would break out in two weeks, he gave them keys for receiving the Holy Spirit:-

(1) Confess all known sin to God, receiving forgiveness through Jesus Christ.

(2) Remove anything from your life that you

are in doubt or feel unsure about.

(3) Be totally yielded and obedient to the

Holy Spirit.

(4) Publicly confess the Lord Jesus Christ.

Slowly and quietly, Evan spoke of the deep things of God and Christ, the hours passing quite unobserved, while tears coursed uninterruptedly over the cheeks of his listeners. People passing by the church commented freely and wonderingly upon the unusual spectacle of lights burning in full blaze at such an hour.

Inside the building strange things were happening. Young men and women who had never been known to speak openly of any experience of saving grace stood and testified fearlessly. Others were bowed in prayer. Some sang the hymns of Zion. Tears, sobs, and songs of praise were intermingled, continuing until near midnight. Planning to meet the following evening, the happy throng dispersed in all

directions. The next day the event was the talk of the village, and that evening, the chapel was packed with people, many coming out of curiosity. Revival broke out in Loughor, and within two weeks the Welsh Revival was national news! Evan Roberts and Loughor, from this point, became the main focus of the Revival, although many others were involved.

When it became known that some of the outstanding characters of the neighbourhood had been converted after withstanding gospel appeals of eminent preachers for a lifetime, and that these were declaring newfound joy and faith without shame or fear, the excitement became tense. Rumours sped far and wide.

Down in the bowels of the earth, miners not only discussed the services, but sang boisterously the grand old, almost forgotten hymns, learned in their childhood.

This was a Revival with youth on fire - young men, yes and especially young women. It was the prophecy of Joel chapter 2 being fulfilled. After the first stirrings at New Quay, young women continued to play a vital role in the Revival - Florrie Evans went on a team to North Wales with her friend Maud - others used their voices as instruments of God's message, and amongst the most well known was Annie Davies of Maesteg who travelled with Evan Roberts and his team.

Revival teams, consisting of young people, mostly Spirit-filled young women, led by such men as Joseph Jenkins the minister at New Quay, Forward Movement Evangelist Seth Joshua, Sydney Evans who was Evan Roberts' friend at College, and Evan Roberts himself, travelled throughout Wales with their Spirit-led teams, conducting evangelistic revival meetings.

Meetings went on for many hours - often for more than 10 without a break. People lost all sense of time and churches were so full that crowds gathered outside until they could somehow squeeze their way in.

The meetings broke with the conventional and bypassed the traditional - often the ministers just sat down, unable to preach or even to understand the phenomena that took over their usually sedate churches and chapels - and the mighty move of God that impacted them was a manifestation of love and power which completely transformed thousands of lives. The Revival rapidly spread all over Wales, as churches "caught the fire" and the Spirit moved throughout the land, in great power. News of dramatic conversions, confession of sin, and songs of joy spread rapidly.

Wherever Evan Roberts went the Holy Spirit brought deep conviction of sin and a new spiritual dimension into the lives of formerly cold churchgoers. Evan was not an expository preacher and his method was prayer and exhortation, leading to a moving of the Holy Spirit bringing deep conviction.

In one of the valley communities, young men and women walked in procession through the streets, singing hymns and visiting public houses to invite those inside to come to the revival. Many of the places were completely deserted and others had their trade depleted.

In one such drinking place there was one solitary customer sitting gloomily alone. Suddenly the evening air was rent with the jubilant voices of happy songsters, just outside the door. So infuriated were the man and woman in charge at the audacity of these zealous youths that they picked up some of the empty ale-pots and flung them recklessly at the happy youngsters. Disgusted with the conduct of his host and hostess, the solitary patron rose from his seat, joined the enthusiastic processionists, then went with them to the church, where he surrendered to Christ!

There was a new excitement about eternal things. Family devotions and public prayer meetings were started and continued regularly for years. The sales of Bibles increased to such a degree that the shops sold their entire stocks. Everywhere there was a new spirit of prayer and an urgency to preach the Gospel.

The effects of the Revival were not confined to Wales. Reports were distributed internationally in newspaper and magazine reports and the Holy Spirit repeated what He had done in Wales from America to Australia. Evan Roberts prayed for 100,000 converts, and it is estimated that there were, in fact, well over 150,000.

As revival fire spread across Wales in late 1904 and early 1905, although no official records were kept of the actual number converted, 150,000 is considered a very conservative estimate, during the first six months! People's lives were transformed by the thousands. This was indeed, a sovereign move of God's Holy Spirit!

Whole communities were turned upside down, and were radically changed from depravity to glorious goodness. The crime rate dropped, often to nothing. The police force reported that they had little more to do than supervise the coming and going of the people to the chapel prayer meetings, while magistrates turned up at courts to discover no cases to try. The alcohol trade was decimated, as people were caught up more by what happened in the local chapels than the local public houses and bars. Families experienced amazing renewal, where the money earning husband and father, the bread winner, had wasted away the income and sowed discord, but now under the moving power of the Holy Spirit, following the conversion to be a follower of Jesus Christ, he not only provided correctly for family needs, but was now with the family, rather than wasting his time, and wages, in the public houses of the village or town. Souls were saved, individual lives were changed and Society itself was changed. Countless numbers were converted to Christ.

There are men and women still in churches today whose parents or grandparents' testimonies were that they were converted in the Revival in 1904 or 1905. Not only were individual lives changed by the power of the Holy Spirit, but whole communities were changed, indeed society itself was changed. Wales again was a God-fearing

nation! Public houses were now almost empty. Men and women who used to waste their money getting drunk were saving it, giving it to help their churches, buying clothes and food for their families. And not only drunkenness, but stealing and other offences grew less and less, so that often a magistrate came to court, and found there were no cases for him.

Men whose language had been filthy before, learnt to talk purely. It is related that not only did the colliers put in a better day's work, but also that the pit ponies were so used to being cursed and sworn at, that they just couldn't understand orders being given in kind, clean words! Yet, still the work output increased. The dark tunnels underground in the mines echoed with the sounds of prayer and hymns, instead of oaths and nasty jokes and gossip.

People who had been careless about paying their bills, or paying back money they had borrowed, paid up all they owed. People who had fallen out became friends again.

During the latter part of 1905, Evan Roberts was suffering increasingly from nervous exhaustion. His ministry was viciously, publicly attacked by a Congregational minister from Dowlais, who called into question the Revival. This actually affected Roberts greatly and, exhausted as he was, he went into deep depression. He went away to recover, and sadly, his absence eventually led to the quenching of the fires of revival.

"War on the Saints" - Enter Jezebel

Ironically, it was the young Evan Roberts' earnestness to be honourable in his ministry and leadership of the Revival, coupled with the fact that he was very impressionable to the opinions of people whom he, sometimes misguidedly, considered more spiritually mature than himself, that, especially in his state of physical, exhaustion, made him not only vulnerable to depression, but sadly, in his confused state of mind, brought about his ultimate withdrawal from his role in the Revival.

When Evan Roberts met Mrs. Jessie Penn-Lewis at a Keswick-in-Wales Convention, in his vulnerable state of mind, he was easily impressed with her speaking and writing ability, as well as the apparent sympathy shown towards him, both by her husband and herself.

Although there is much to be commended in her earlier writings, sadly, many did not realise the extent to which Mrs. Penn-Lewis had become obsessed to the point of paranoia, with manifestations of a supernatural nature, condemning as demonic virtually all manifestations in the Welsh and Pentecostal Revivals. Entering into confrontation with the leaders of both the Keswick Convention, and the burgeoning Pentecostal Movement based in Sunderland, she caused a great deal of conflict.

As the Welsh Revival was characterised by many manifestations of a Pentecostal nature, with many instances of gifts of the Spirit exercised by many people, including Evan Roberts himself, Mrs. Penn-Lewis condemned much that took place during the Welsh Revival as spurious.

So it was, that Evan Roberts, the "Elijah" of the Welsh Revival came under the influence of the woman many referred to as "Jezebel". Jessie Penn-Lewis gained Evan's confidence, and she and her husband invited him to stay in their home in Leicester, ostensibly to recover from his exhaustion and depression. In fact, as a result, Evan went through a state of spiritual trauma that, sadly, undermined his usefulness to the Revival.


There is, however, a little-known sequel to the Evan Robert's story. As he began to recover, it evidently began to dawn on him that he was being deceived. Twelve months after its publication, Evan Roberts disassociated himself from the book, "War on the Saints", which was written by Jessie Penn-Lewis.

Evan Roberts did some traveling, writing and preaching, and eventually, in the 1920's, he returned to Wales, making his final home in Cardiff.

One of the former members of Evan Roberts' Revival Team arranged meetings for him in the Loughor area. They were held in the Old Post Office, Gorseinon. Many attended to hear the revivalist, and they were apparently tremendous meetings, reminiscent in many ways, of the Revival itself.

Not only were souls converted, but having shaken off the "Penn-Lewis paranoia", Evan Roberts was now preaching the Full Gospel with signs following, including healing for the sick and casting out demons with effective results. This is consistent with the real legacy of the Welsh Revival.

Evan Roberts had returned to Wales in 1926 to look after his sick father. Reports say that when he was asked to pray at his father's funeral in 1928, witnesses said the anointing of God, as an electric-like force, was so great when he prayed, that they thought Revival would break out again. This apparently characterised each of his rare public appearances in later years. He lived in Cardiff after his father died until he passed away in 1951. He was buried in Morah Chapel, Loughor.

its ok to disagree

I have had a few personal notes in my inbox that people do not think in this day and age that we can attain such a powerful walk with God that people will recognize us without one word being said. I know this is my personal opinion and I respect yours too, but I totally believe we "can" achieve this type of living. I am challenging myself to work on being more sactified in all areas of my life. We are getting rid of tv stations once again and only going to be able to use our tv for movies WE approve of for the kids. We have been too lenient too much on our kids in what they watch anymore, thinking, well if their kids watch it, it muse not be THAT bad. But we can't live our lives on what others do. If God called us to be careful with what we watch, it is sin if we don't, no matter what anyone else does. I believe that this is a key to the way some of our youth AND adults for that matter act today. There is so much violence and sex on tv that we don't even blink an eye about it anymore. When titanic came out, I was totally embarrassed that we took our kids to see that, Roger and I were embarrassed ourselves to see it and if I watched it about a year ago, I don't really think it would even bother me. I have changed so much in the past 8 years for the worse, and by the grace of God I want my sensitivity to the evils of this world back. I am not trying to say there is anything wrong with you if you don't agree. " I" am not even "willing" to make the sacrifice to change in all areas of my life YET myself, but it is my hearts cry, and hopefully as I give up one, God will challenge me to give up another. I know if you look at my life now, there are many areas where you could pick out where I fail, but God is changing me "one step at a time, one day at a time". thank you for your input


"The Lord shall preserve thee from all evil: He shall preserve thy soul" (Psa. 121:7). How does Satan get an opening? When we stop seeking after holiness, purity, righteousness, truth; when we stop praying, when we stop reading the Word and give way to carnal appetites, it is "then" that satan comes to steal, kill and destroy. So often sickness comes as a result of disobedience. David said, "Before I was afflicted, I went astray." Seek the Lord and He will sanctify every thought, every act, till your whole being is on fire with holy purity and your one desire will be for Him who has created you in holiness. Oh, how I long for this holiness! Can we be made pure? We can. Every inbred sin must go. God can cleanse away every evil thought. Can we have a hatred for sin and a love for righteousness? Yes, God will create within us a pure heart. He will take away our stoney heart. He will cleanse us with His Spirit, and we will be cleansed from all thy filthiness. When will He do it? When you and I seek Him for such inward purity. BUT God doesn't force Himself upon any of us, it is our choice how deep we want the deeper things of God. God says, if we seek Him, we will find Him. I want to seek Him in the deep waters, not the shallow ones.

my prayer

Lord, I don't want people to think at all that I think I am more special for wanting more. I have sat under a lot of teachings about revival, and I put it down for about ten years, and I am ready to pick my vision back up again. I want to eventually write a book about the stirrings that you place upon my heart. I know You are doing something inside my soul, but I'm not sure what yet. I will take it one day at a time, one challenge at a time. It took a long time for me to stop condemning myself for decisions I have made in the past. I need to stop thinking what others think, and dwell more about what You think. I have come to far to look back, but Lord I need that strength to look ahead, to the vision You are placing in my heart NOW.
I am tired of thinking to myself "twelve years ago, God worked in my life like this, or that way. I need to look to what you are doing in my life Now. I have sat many years now since I was sick, and I believe I needed that time to sit and be healed, physically, emotionally and spiritually. I am sorry there were times that I was not there for my kids, but I am thankful that You were. Right now I still feel horrible with the medicines trying to work all out of my system, but Lord, I don't want to go back that route, so I am at peace till the time I walk with no pain. I have lost some friends to talk to because I think they think I went off the deep end, most are some of the friends I have made in the past ten years, the friends I had before I was depressed, knew my belief that God can work today as He did many years ago. So Lord, I am picking that vision up again. I will run with it unless you tell me to stop running and lead me in another direction. Right now I feel so wretched. I lose patience with my children, that is my biggest struggle, mainly Megan, for lying all the time. But Lord, I place her in Your hands, just help me to not take her back. I proclaim that my younger children will have the zeal and fire for your work like Tori and Jacob do. I am so blessed and I can't even believe why you waited so long for me to get my act back together, but I'm sure glad you did. I am finally beginning to have You in my thoughts all through the day, no matter what I am doing. It took awhile to get to that point again. Lord I am so in awe of your love for me. The desire of my heart was for children and you gave me more then I could even imagine. I pray for strength as Jacob gets ready to go to Tulsa. Father help the tears to stop every time I think of it. I love all my children the same, but there is a different bond between a mother and a son. I don't know what it is. Maybe because when he was little he was so sick we thought he might die, but the reason that "I" think it is, is because I think of what it would be like to rock you in a rocking chair when you were an infant. I sit with Gabe some nights when everyone is in bed and have praise and worship music playing, and I imagine that he is You, how it would have been to be your mother and rock you, kiss your cheeks and sing about our Father to you. There is something about a baby boy around the holidays for me that brings the christmas story that much more alive. Anyway Lord, please take away this headache, we have life group tonight and I am so excited to kick off the new year. I will meet you here tonight in prayer, meanwhile, stay close beside me, and never never stop breathing upon my life and heart. I love you daddy.

past mistakes

It is easy to be negative about past mistakes and unhappiness. But it is much more healing to look at ourselves and our past in the light of experience, acceptance, and growth.
Our past is a series of lessons that advance us to higher levels of living and loving. The relationships we entered, stayed in, or ended taught us necessary lessons.

Some of us have emerged from the most painful circumstances with strong insights about who we are and what we want. Our mistakes? Necessary. Our frustrations, failures, and sometimes stumbling attempts at growth and progress? Necessary too. Each step of the way, we learned. We went through exactly the experiences we need to, to become who we are today. Each step of the way, we progressed. Is our past a mistake? I don't know if we should call them mistakes or not... but I think that the only mistake we can make is not learning from our past experiences!

Today, God, help me let go of negative thoughts I may be harboring about my past circumstances or relationships. I can accept, with gratitude, where it has brought me to today.

Salt covenant????

I just started to read a book called "the salt covenant". I looked up why God used the word salt for many stories....Lots wife turning into a pillar of salt....why salt and not stone? What does "salt" stand for in these stories? I found this book online and now I am very excited to find out. I know that salt preserves, but I have never heard about a salt covenant.

Jacobs wish

I was thinking today about my children when they were little and when Jacob was about ten, I was really reading a lot about Smith Wigglesworth, and I would read the book to Jacob. He was sooo enthralled about his life, that he asked me if he could keep the book I was reading to him. He one day said to me... "When I grow up I want to be just like Wigglesworth! He at that time thought he wanted to be a pastor so I called up Pastor Gerry and asked him if he would mentor him for a day. So Jacob followed him around for a whole day to see what a pastor did during his day. Pastor Gerry told him that day that he was going to tell God that he wanted Him to save Jacob for one of his daughters.......... up until 2000, my prayer for Jacob was that God would anoint him like he has the pastors through the great revivals. In 2000 I laid that prayer down because of depression, and for a time I was not walking with God. But.......... I have picked my visions and prayers back up again soooooooooooooooooo" JASON.... ARE YOU READY?

Jesus wept

I just was reading in commentaries about the bible verse "Jesus wept" I always thought it was because Jesus was sad about Lazarus dying. I guess I never really thought about it but why would He be sad? He knew he could heal him from death. He was sad because of the familys' unbelief. How is THAT for something to chew on! Something so simple to realize, but yet I never did. Such a powerful statement in just those two words. Mabye............ God intended to use the shortest verse in the bible to have such a deep meaning. hmmmm anyway, I was so excited to read up on that today.

Tuesday, July 14, 2009

A new excitement.... "A teacup and a prayer"

God is doing something inside me. The bible says be still and know that I am God. I have been still and waited for a long time now. God is telling me it is time to do something, that I have been still long enough. I was beginning to think that all God wanted me to do was be a mom, which is a blessing, but I want more. To be more for God will make me be more for my children. I have a new excitement in me that has not been there for a very long time. An excitement in knowing that God is preparing me for something special, something different. An excitement in knowing that He hears me when I call out to Him. Sometimes I feel that God is a respecter of persons, but I know that He hears us when we ask. My heart has always been in hospitality. We recently started to host a life group at our home, and it gave me a zeal that I have been praying for. I was satisfied with just that, but God wasn't. Since I came back from depression a while back, I still have not gotten in touch with old friends. I shy away from anyone who knew me. Recently I have been feeling the need to rekindle my friendships with old girlfriends. God has been nudging me to start a bible study in our home in the area of friends. Friendships are very important because they provide a way for us to be accountable to one another, and also to learn from one another from our trials and blessings. They provide a way for the older friends to teach the younger ones about life, to be an example, and to share wisdom from things that we ourselves have already been through.The bible study will meet once a month and will be called..."A teacup and a prayer". I don't exactly know what all He is preparing me for, but I do know that I am ready, willing, and by the grace of God, I have been through a battle in the past years that has made me stronger, that has made my faith soar, and has made me persevere. I am confident that whatever valley He has me go through, his grace, and steadfast love will get me back up on that mountain. Father, may I always have a teachable spirit, and may I always take time to be still, and hear your voice. I love you

Wednesday, July 1, 2009

the highway I travel

I ask God to direct my steps. I have faith that He will. Why then when things get rough do I always wonder how I got here? Father, help me keep in my mind that when You bring me to it, You will get me through it. Help me not ask "why" but "when". Please give me Your heart to reach the lost. Give me that servants heart, help me not to want to "choose" who You want me to minister to, but be ready to minister to "whoever" you put in my "highway" Father, help me to always have a teachable spirit, a willing heart, and a stirring spirit. I love You.